Sairam friends,
Yesterday, I went out of office to do some printing work and when ever such work comes, I am so eager to go out and my friends tease me. I like to do some physical work like going out stuff rather than sitting and looking into monitor. There was lots of work and we were confused by evening due to some error and I wondered how we are going to fix it.A girl working in the printing house who was very active and charmingly helped us. It really was not her work as they are simply supposed to print, give it to us and move on.
We kept all the papers on a Table and tried to arrange it in order. The girl helped us arrange and also until we gave it for binding the books, she was supporting us. Someone was waiting to pick her but she continued to help us. Finally my friend asked her to go. I was really thinking how this girl can be so sincere?.
Do we have more women who are sincere at work in this country or do our Men are occupied with the responsibilities of their family that they are not able to serve better at work?
Its good India has millions of Men and women actively perusing their career but when they are married and have children, few really have to face struggles.
Sometimes, their child might get sick and at times, they need help in their education. So parents have to plan accordingly and make sure children are happy and satisfied.
For a long time now, I wanted to write about the sacrifice Children does for their parents career. Few decades back India had joint family system and even the Mother will be a house wife to take care of the child. Today, as Women mostly are going for a Job, they really have to take the responsibility of Taking care of family and also their Children.
As of 2013, in India, women were 26.1% of all rural workers, and 13.8% of all urban workers. Though the numbers are less, in most families, we see parents doesn’t have enough time to spend with their children and especially nothing much is done for their education.
Most families around the world are earning and saving money especially for their Son/Daughters education. Most middle class families in India spends more than half of their salary for their child’s education. So a career indirectly is the means for good future of a child.
You can’t chase dreams ignoring your family
We have become so much engaged with our work that we have a passion to achieve our goals and dreams in Career. There are some couples who easily get into the habit of leaving their children in a residential schools and perusing their goal. They are busy with their Job, Business and of course earn a lot. Parents make money especially for their child’s bright future. But does a big bank balance really matter when your child didn’t got enough attention and love personally from their parents on a day to day basis?
Even children living with their parents are at times managing take care of themselves and learn by themselves as their parents won’t have time to support them in their busy schedule.
The following words from New york Times article By Josh Levs really touched me.
For parents, sacrifice is living the dream
“Everyone should chase big dreams. It brings a deep sense of satisfaction. And it makes the world better. We have advanced societies, stronger buildings to withstand storms, medical discoveries, technology, entertainment and so much more because dreamers pursued their visions and worked hard to make them happen.
But dream-chasing can also be addictive. Some people become so obsessed with making one idea happen that they stop focusing on what’s most important in their lives. They stop spending time with their families and friends. As with any addiction, they pay a price.
In the moment my son was being born, all my professional dreams ceased to exist. In that room, it was just the four of us — my wife, our then 3-year-old son, the baby, and me. Family and fatherhood were all I saw.
Life was shining a spotlight on my original dream.
The first dreams we ever had were to be held. And loved. And to explore this amazing world with love in our lives.
We dreamed of seeing, touching, and experiencing the world around us, with the happiness and comfort that comes from family.”
Are you teaching your child?
When your kids need any help in their subjects, they cannot always turn to a teacher. Its important for parents to guide their children and take at least few minutes to know their weakness, encourage them and teach them. Some children may not like being taught their parents but then too you have another responsibility.
You can teach them to be a better human being. To be polite. To be Kind and to cultivate good habits. If you are always thinking about your own growth in Career, you might eventually end up sacrificing your children’s future no matter how much you earn.
You may not have time to teach your children but its possible. Even women with 2 jobs can surely allot time to help their children learn better.
The Sacrifice Children does for their Parents Career
Most children does know that their parents Career is important to make their life more comfortable and peaceful. When my Sister’s daughter Katya kept demanding her to take on a Vacation. My sister simply said “We will take you for Vacation when Dad gets a Big job”. I wonder what the child understood but once she asked “Dad, When will you get a Big Job?”
They felt really sweet and immediately took her on a vacation, to some beach and beautiful places.
Honestly, children does know your handwork gives them the best in their life.
Mostly, Women sacrifice their career for taking care of the family. Especially to rise children. “Sacrifice” to some may mean quitting the job and to some it may mean doing some temporary arrangements. My Sister was living away from her child for many month and finally she realized her child needs her and took decision that really shows her love for her child and family.
My Mom and myself kept telling her surely, she will get a better Job even in the new city. My sister had to complete her research work and once in a while moved back to another city.
What made me think about Sacrifice Children does for their parents career?
I was really happy couple of weeks back as my Sister got job and she can also take care of her child. It means a lot for us as my sister is very ambitious and wanted to continue her research. When she got job, She told her child “Katya, you are responsible for Mom to get this Job”
Katya asked why and my sister said “You understood Mom has to work and lived with your Father as a good girl for almost a year now. You took care of yourself and were a good girl and supported me”
Katya simply said “OK..OK”
My Brother in law was very kind that he took responsibility of taking care of his daughter very patiently and he loved it most.
I wonder if I can be so good to the girl I marry to help her in her career ambitions but I learn from him. As I said, I am an Ordinary Indian and we have to come out of our concepts that only women have to sacrifice for the family and do our part.
When ever I used to demand something to my parents they used to scold me saying “Look. Your sisters little child is not getting all the support she needs in this age and being grownup you are still not responsible”
At times, when Katya is sick, she used to be a very good girl and tell her Mom. You call Nanny( baby sitter). I shall be with her and you can go for work. My parents used to go to U.S once in a while especially to take care of Katya.
My sister had a balance between her Career and family. She loved her child so much that a situation came, she had to decide between Career and Child. She said its enough and went to take care of Katya and I believe this decision itself became a blessing for her.
I believe God is happy when you take care of your child.
Though my sister is now taking care of Katya peacefully, she had to temporarily come to another City for her work. So Katya had sent her a cute letter and a Bead Necklace. There are some words which you can’t get in this letter but it shows how much she loves her Mom.
“When you come back, we have lots of stuff to do and I also want to tell you, I made a necklace” – A child’s letter to her mother
Why this article suits StarSai?
Mostly women Sai devotees write me about problems in their family or simply their devotion on Shirdi Saibaba and most of these mails comes from some office somewhere in the world. I know many working women who want to be Mother and who are Mother’s are coming here.
I know its really hectic to be responsible both to your family and work. Women has to work and I honestly believe your Career can assure your child’s good future but when situations calls you for taking care of your child, try to find other options. See if you can spend more time with your child.
Home Schooling really helps your children as you can teach with love. You can correct them as teachers see your child only as one among others in the class.I wish Mother’s who read this write their experiences and some suggestion as it helps everyone.
This article is dedicated to millions of Children who sacrifice their comfort for their parents to pursue their career and business.
Children are you Future and their welfare should be your concern that any other thing in world.
May Shirdi Sai Baba be with you and bless you to take care of your children with the love they deserve.
Love,
Venkat
