Sairam friends,
Firstly, I was planning to make a simple website to feature professionals in various sector for many years and tried with different names. Nothing worked. Finally, Sai gave me a name in dream this morning. Will a Saint suggest name of a website in dream? Strange ah? It happens. If my Guru tells me something, I will immediately work on it. Within next 4 hours, I launched a site and already made a guy from Hong Kong give me an interview.
Edited sites name
I may not have time to work on it regularly but its my hobby project as I love learning from different people about their dreams and achievements. Secondly, I had always told this to any devotee who is depressed.
“When nothing seems to happen in your life, divert yout mind. Do something productive. Learn something new”
There are people who say that I am drinking because I am facing a problem. I did this because I have no peace etc. Well, when you are facing difficulties in life, you can also focus on positive habits and work. That’s why even Sai helps me divert my mind by making me do something creative.
I got clarity and feel relaxed after 4 long month
Long story short!
I liked this girl. I asked Sai.
Sai started blessing me with dreams.
Not one.Not two
But several dreams.
Reality was different and I told Sai to help me come out of it.
Finally, I got some clarity today!
Thanks for all the care you have on me. Some of you read my previous post and mailed if asking if I am alright. – He has no reason to confuse and humiliate me
Something really surprising happened today. I can’t say what but it gave me confidence in what ever Sai told me in dreams. So I shall believe in him but accept reality and move on with my life. People might think I am crazy for being like this. Its hard. Really hard to live when reality is not matching what Baba contineously tells me. So I have taken a decision. I told Sai, let his words be true. I trust that with heart and soul. Now, lets think about it realistically. I am too old for such things to happen. My parents doesn’t always keep good health. So let me go on my way. I pleaded Sai to get me out of this. Finally, I realized he want me to do it on my own. So let me be detached. I had enough pain due to this whole episode.
I am able to write this because Sai proved what he has told me finally. I can’t directly say what happened but he convinced me that he cares for me. Atleast, I won’t feel guilty for my behaviour anymore because I know how much Sai was involved in this.
I can’t prove it to anyone but I feel much better now.
After August 2016, tonight, I am going to sleep peacefully without asking Sai to guide me in dream because he already did all that he could do to me. Sai has never let me down. Being too sensitive, I can’t bear that I am not able to prove this girl what Sai did to me. Now, I let go of it. Even trying to prove that I am right is wrong. Practically speaking, what I did wasn’t right and let me accept it.
Some of you might mistake me reading previous article that I sound negatively when I say not all Sai dreams have come true. Let me clarify this. Sai has taught me a lot in the past 12 years. He has also changed what he once told me and tested if I accept it. I had always gone by his desire.
Secondly, dream is A and reality is B.
The journey from A to B isn’t that easy a task. Why am I suffering now? Its because I want this girl’s life to be smooth and happy. Why would I even think of her? When Sai tells me something else, I am left to worry about what’s gonna happen. I prayed enough as I want everyone I come across in life to be happy. I believe, I had prayed enough.
Now, I wish to move on. Its already too late for me. Eventually, I tried to see if I can prove that Sai told me something to couple of my friends. The more I tried, the more they laughed at me though they care for me. Its humiliating when I can’t prove my Sai to them.
Its OK.
Someday, I will be able to answer them. Now when they question me, I can only blink and accept my failure.
I feel little relaxed today. It took so long for Baba to tell me that he’s with me. He has always told me in dream but now he also showed his power in reality. I am totally depressed and hurt. If I keep saying that, it just means I am holding on to the same issue. So let me drop this as of now.
Its Over.
I just feel very guilty when ever i come across this girl. I can’t run away. I had to manage for some more days and I hope to change.
That’s it for now.
Thanks Padmini Aunty, Nirupa and all my Sai friends. I am alright but trust me writing those kind of articles are important too. If I don’t know no one will know how to lead life if they are in my situation. What ever I write is for Sai devotees in the generations to come. Even after I die, my words will speak for itself. I don’t want anyone to suffer the way I did in the past 4 month. The suffering still continues, I am just trying to detach myself from it as of now.
Sai’s words will come true. Due to my current situation, I am trying to let go.
I will focus on something productive.
Sai blessings,
Venkat
