How Shirdi Saibaba wants a man to perceive a women?

Sairam friends,

Happy belated Raksha Bandhan to all of you.

I wasn’t aware that today is Raksha Bandhan. This morning, while at work, one of my Sai friend in Mumbai, told me its raksha bandhan and asked what’s happening. I told her, most people in Tamilnadu doesn’t give importance to Raksha bandhan and hence its good for me. he he… Atleast not in Coimbatore as for as I have experienced.

I told this to one of my friend at work and she said “I Celebrate” and from today “You are my brother”. I told her, I did a same side goal for me. Anyway, She’s a good friend of mine. So what ever way she perceives me, that’s OK for me.

I am listening to this song now – Chura Lo Na Dil Mera..Sanam – I like Neha’s Salwar, her innocence and the following lyrics shot in a home garden and kitchen with a simple choreography.

Chura lo na dil mera sanam
Bana lo na apna sanam
Ki tere bin na ji sakenge
Ki tere bin na mar sakenge
Hum soch kar kahenge

Which in my simple translation goes like this

Steal my heart.Make me as yours

(Say) That you can’t live without me..

That you can’t die without me…

I shall think about it and say!

Super cool! ah?

Let’s now analyze how Shirdi Saibaba wants a man to perceive a women…

I am not someone who remembers the names and incidents during Saibaba’s life time very clearly but I remember the message I understood from that.

What’s wrong if a Mother is being kissed?

Sai loves his devotees so much that he lets them have fun. Once this old man was doing seva to Saibaba sitting near his feet. Another devotee by name Mousibai too was serving Sai. Since both these devotees were sitting close to each other, his face came near Mousibai’s. So she immediately laughed and said “This man has gray hair but so bad that he’s trying to kiss me”. He gets frustrated and shouts at her proving his innocence. Sai enjoys this conversation for a while. Then, he tells this “What’s wrong if a Mother is being kissed?”

Then, they both realize that they were arguing for silly reasons and cooled down.

Saibaba’s School – Test this man. Let’s see if he passes this exam?

Do you all know Saibaba had a school in Shirdi? That’s the hut of Radhakrishnamai. If a male devotee is intensely devoted to Saibaba, he asks him to go to Shala – School. Meaning, Sai asks to go to Radhakrishmai’s house and help her with some chores. She used to cook for devotees who come to see baba, She used to clean Dwarakamai and she takes up all the work and needs some assistants.

Let’s leave others. What if I really lived during Saibaba’s life time. I do to Dwarakamai and Sai is surprised with my devotion. He just wanted me to pass in the final exam. A man can be unattached to money but how will be perceive a women? This has to be tested.

Now, let’s say Sai tells this to me “Venkat…Go to Radhakrishnamai’s house and do the work she gives”.

I go there and knock the door. She opens the door and what thought process goes in my mind?

Do I think…Oh She’s such a beautiful lady? Sai doesn’t bother this thought as he knows that’s natural. ( Who knows me better than Sai?) But how do I actually behave with her matters. Do I respect her as an elder Sister? She’s a widow who came to Shirdi and made it her home. When Baba sends a Man to her house, he wants him to have that motherly affection on her. If he passes this exam, his spiritual growth will be great.

Once retired judge of Indor M.G.Rege comes to have darshan of Baba. Sai sends him to Shala. He goes to Radhakrishnamai’s hut and knocks the door. She never opens the door and asks him to go back. He goes back to Baba and tells what happened. Baba tells him “Now go again. She will open the door and give you some work to do like cleaning etc”.

He walks again to Radhakrishnamai’s house. This time, she opens the door and immediately falls in his feet.

Why did she behave like this? What happened in between. Did Saibaba communicate with her subconsciously that Rege is gem of a man? We never know.

Your land is where it is. But what were you about to do to the poor women?

Once Sathe’s Father in law buys 20 acres of land to gift him but he did not want his daughter and son in law to visit the land as he don’t want his other daughter’s to know he has given such a big gift to this girl. ( They were all married earlier and settled). Sathe’s wife listened to her Dad’s request and decided not to go in the horse cart to visit the land. Sathe insists his wife to come with him and gets furious when she was stubborn. He immediately takes a stick used to rear the horse to beat her.

Meanwhile, Saibaba knows what’s happening though Dwarakamai was situated far from this place. Baba asks a devotee to run to Sathe and ask him to come to Dwarakamai.

Sathe drops the stick down and reaches Saibaba.

Baba immediately asks him” Your land is where it is. What’s the necessity to see. Why beat the poor women for this?”

Sathe realizes his mistake and never beat his wife again.

I have wrote just 3 incidents here but there are several incidents during Sai’s life time in which Sai expressed how a Man should take care of the Women in his life. I have wrote several articles in StarSai on this topic but I still get mails from some women saying her husband left her, their Son/Daughter is not respecting her etc.

My sweet & adamant Sister

Today being Raksha Bandhan, I wish to share this to you all.

There was a time when my Sister wanted to marry someone she liked. I hated that guy to core. I know he will spoil her life for sure. I kept telling this to her but she did not listen to me. My Sister was too ambitious, wants freedom in what ever she does and I know someone sticking to Indian attitude of dominating would never suit her. Many people ask why I pray so much when my life is like this. Well, I don’t care how my life is. I know my prayers saved my Sister’s life because God gave her a chance to realize she deserves a better guy and fortunately she met someone with a good heart and got married. Today, If I am happy, it is because my sister is happy. She too has her own hardships personally and professionally but basically she’s doing good by Sai grace.

It’s been 6 years since I met my Sister and wonder when she will come to India? But I don’t feel like missing her much because she’s in my heart. In every single prayer I do, In every single temple visit I make, my Sister and her family are with me.

Once, I remember when we were in Chennai, my aunt scolded my Sister as she came home late for which she cried a lot. I could not bear my sister crying. So I hugged and kissed her with tears in my eyes. I can’t bear anyone hurting my sister even if she did mistake. Once in a while, My Sister shouts at me and my parents even now over phone but we will only be surprised if she’s not like that. This is what you call as love. You accept someone for what they are.

You can call me as a brother but the intention is what bothers me most?

Many times, I have come across girls who call me Anna, Bhayya etc. Well, I accept it happily. I prefer someone calling me by my name though but you can always perceive me as you wish. That’s completely cool. The point is when some girls call me brother purposely to establish a “Code of conduct” so that I won’t perceive them any other way. Look. If this is your intention, better don’t even speak to me. This is one of the worst habits of all in this country.

I have been hurt like this on several occasions. Once, I went to my friends house to meet her. While leaving, her Father said “Won’t you come for her marriage”. I am fed up with such dialogues. He means to say “My daughter is going to marry someone else and hence you better see her as a sister”.

Excuse me! “Did I came to your home to ask for your daughter?” will be my feeling. Anyway, You call it cultural stupidity to an extent. I forgave you. Carry on. I know your daughter won’t marry whom you suggest too…he he…

And then there’s another occasion when someone came to my home without taking their daughter. They can tell me 1000 reasons but all those doesn’t sound true to me.

I just know when a Man is not married, you do what ever you can to save yourself from him. What am I going to do?

After all, a Sai servant.

There’s a bigger world out there to protect yourself from.

Having said that, I like the quote by Mae West – “Every man I meet wants to protect me. I can’t figure out what from.” Ha ha…isn’t that funny?

May Sai Baba protect every girl who reads this and bring happiness in the heart of every Mom and Dad who assumes they are protecting their daughter. There was this Spanish guy who came for my Sisters wedding. He saw me being very possessive about my Sister and asked me

“Are you going with her when she walks down in a subway in London?”

That was just an example he put forward as my Sister had gone to U.K once during her Phd days in Germany. I replied “But I pray for her every moment”.

He said “You live too far. You can’t do anything”.

I said “But my prayers will send someone to protect her”.

I say this for all the so called protective Indian parents, brothers and sisters. You can only say a prayer for your sweet daughter or sister.

Keep praying and doing good. When you do good to others, God will do good to your child.