Learning to listen and stopping the flow of words – Do not react emotionally

Sairam friends,

Thanks to all devotees who wished me on my Birthday. It was kind of all of you. I also spoke to my friends at work and very few friends at Saibaba temple. I was spending most of the day with my parents and waiting for the new broadband connection to reach my home but due to rain things never happened. I was not able to do any work. In the evening, I reached Shirdi Saibaba temple and bought 3 lamps as usual. I walked to the tray near Dwarakamai, used the big temple lamp to light my little lamps.

I saw a man lighting candles from the candles already lit by other devotees. As if its a reflex action, I told him “You can use the temple’s lamp to light”. He continued to light his candles and I repeated “I said, you can use this temple lamp”. His answer was a surprise to me.

He said “I am not speaking anything. You are saying something and I am just listening”

This could be a harsh answer but to me, I din’t took it that way.

I came into Dwarakamai, stood in front of Dhuni and tried to understand what I can learn from this devotee.

1. Do not suggest anything even if its good

I usually have a habit of suggesting what is good and what’s not right at my work place. May be, I must stop doing it. We must not tell what’s right and wrong to people as they are doing something they think is right. Even if you are experienced in something, its better to maintain a low profile and think twice before suggesting what’s right to do.

2. When someone speaks, listen but don’t react immediately

We have always been taught to respond immediately. At times, its wise to react with words but in some situations, better give a time gap before you say anything.It could be just couple of seconds, 10 seconds or even request them that you will speak after few minutes. Do not make them feel that you don’t care to respond and be very kind to them.

As soon as someone speaks, we “react” to it with our words or action. When I told this man to use the big temple’s lamp to light his candles, he listened to it. Just that he preferred not to bother what I say. He simply did what he likes and moved on. When I requested again, he simply told him “I am not speaking anything and just listening to you”. I apologized to him.

I asked myself if I have ever did this in my life?

When ever my Parents, Sister, friends or any strangers say something “I immediately take it to my heart and react with words”

Learning to listen and stopping the flow of words – Do not react emotionally

Getting emotional is a way of showing that we are egoistic and we deserve to be understood. The world was not built to understand our views, opinions and ideas. The world was built to do its own thing. People do their own thing. We can keep our mind at peace even when people say something which is completely untrue.

Before you speak, stop the flow of words which come’s without thinking

1. React to something after you think a moment.
2. Is it worth reacting?
3. Are we a credible source? People don’t believe us unless we are credible source and there’s no use in speaking back.
4. Think for 5 seconds and speak what’s digestible by everyone around.

Though its a small incident, I realized Sai wants me to let go of things. I am not going to change the world or even my own life by speaking or answering or suggesting what’s good?

All these years, I have only wasted my time speaking without thinking if its worth speaking. You can have fun, tease and have a great time but in some issues its better to take a careful pace.

How do I relate this to Sai?

Let me clarify that all good Saints including Shirdi Saibaba speaks less.

Saibaba utters a word only when necessary.

He don’t force anyone to follow something. He just request’s and stops there.

Saibaba doesn’t worry if someone speaks ill of him. ( Can we stay calm when people speak ill of us or our work)

Saibaba gets emotional purposely in few incidents but there were many situations Saibaba would have reacted emotionally but he stayed calm and cool.

The best example is when Saibaba was accused of helping a thief and the court ordered enquiry.

When the person from Court came to Shirdi to question Saibaba, Sai simply answered him calm and composed.

We can’t be like Sai but we can try our best to stay calm and composed in this noisy world.

Om Sai Ram

Venkat