Like the way a Mother keeps kumkum on her daughter’s forehead

Thanks Sai.

Thanks for making sure broadband doesn’t work at home past 2 days. Laptop doesn’t pick my mobile net and I use my mobile to write this. So here’s your plan. You will tell something in dream. I will follow that like a stupid. When I am embarrassed am not supposed to ask questions. You will make sure I wont write about it. Too smart Sai. Anyway. This isn’t new to me but this time I want you to clarify. All I need is why you did not stop me when I kept asking you to guide me? Even after Sai Satcharita reading, You did not tell me where I went wrong. What everyone will think of me if I blindly I keep on following your dreams?

After I read mail from Shivani who sweetly calls herself as Shamya, I got little satisfaction but its painfully hard for anyone outside my circle to understand

Venkat,

You think laughter of few people who will see you for a few years and then forget and move on is important?
Is it worth the relationship You have with Sai? Do u believe in Baba wholeheartedly? I know u do. More than anyone u believe in Sai…
So how come You are not able to understand his ways?
Is Baba supposed to give only positive experiences? No this saint of Shirdi is not a common saint..

No Venkat your Sai Baba is not here to give you pearls. He is here to give You a diamond but unfortunately this diamond is not something you’ll be able to show off to the world. This diamond will only be for your soul. Satisfaction of your soul.. not your heart.. not your mind… Only and only your soul. If you think you did a mistake and Sai Baba deliberately made you do a mistake, do you think it is not possible?
Have you not read Sai Satcharita? What does Baba say when he explains Geeta to Nanasaheb?

The guru gives his shishya agyan or ignorance NOT knowledge or gyaan because gyaan is not giveable. It is only self realisable..Maybe he made you embarrassed like this only to end this cycle of love pain hurt and depression forever.
In the spiritual realm endings are not happy because happiness is temporal. Endings are ecstatic. Sai will establish u in the permanent realm of ecstacy and he is setting u in that path… Do u think is wearing ochre robes enough? Is talking about sai enough? No brother walk on the path of thorns to reach the lotus feet of sai…
Sudama was the dearest of Krishna yet he made him walk bare foot for so long just to give him a glimpse of himself. But imagine the joy Sudama derived upon meeting Shri Krishna his beloved friend. Narad asked Shri Hari. What do you do to your most beloved?

Shri Hari replied I first snatch away all his wealth, then take away all his relations, then do away with all his worldly reputation. Then he again struggles to earn wealth , reputation , relations. Then I snatch them away once more. Then finally I establish him permanently in my devotion… And then finally give him Vaikuntha.

Why are you waiting for Sai’s indication?  Sai lives and breathes with you. You think a leaf moves without his wish? And if he is the doer then why feel guilty about wrong and arrogant about good?

Is Sai not here with me… He is … He Himself is speaking.. have this firm faith.
Accept what is happening and then see what joy enters your heart.

-Shamya

Shamya said she was too tired these days as she started to work at 6.30 and comes back home at 10.30. In her cab, she has heared the Sai bhajan, I like most – Haridwar, Mathura, Kashi for the first time which she told made her write this mail. She said, its the way Sai takes care of me through her.

Shamya’s mail was written to make me accept even such negative experiences just because I trusted Sai’s words because that’s how Sai works to few people. He wants me to bear the hurt. He wants me to get injured even when I take his words as my life. If this is what he wants me to face even after all these years of love and faith on him, fine. I shall accept it and remain calm.

That’s it.

Sai, I never bothered you like this to give me an explanation when it happened in an environment where I have got nothing to worry about. When this incident happened in an environment where I will get embarrassed, I just keep asking myself “Why did this happen?”

Last night, I hugged a big book on my chest and slept praying you must come in dream and guide me. I only got neck ache when i woke up. No dreams. Fine.I am nobody for you….

I wish to go beyond the “Internet”

As I start to write this article my broadband network got fixed. Sorry Sai! You seem to say that you have no involvement in Indian broadband infrastructure. he he…We must get used to this occasional “No Service” policy. But you did made me realize that I must think beyond internet.

Over the years, I have been getting addicted to internet. Its as if, I don’t have anything to do if internet doesn’t work. Further, all that I try to do has been based on the internet as a platform. I have never thought anything “Real”. Meaning, I must try something “Concrete”.

3 years before, I had a dream as if there’s a office in one of my commercial website’s name. I see the name board and some people crossing the road to get into the building. I even know the location of this building as its just a KM form my office. When ever I cross that place, occasionally I used to ask myself what if I had really worked for that dream? Or is it simply a dream in which Sai asks me not to do it? I never worked on what Sai showed me in dream. I simply left it and moved on to other project. Yesterday, when the I went to Saibaba temple, the priest gave me a Lotus which made me remember the above dream because the site’s name has the term Lotus in it.

So lets see. When my internet was not working, I have this desire to do something real. I have something in mind and if Sai wills, it will materialize.

Now lets come to the theme of the article.

Like the way a Mother keeps kumkum on her daughter’s forehead 

I have got several experiences from the Saibaba temple I visit regularly. Some are pleasant and some are painfully irritating. Sai has shown this temple as a school as I have learnt a lot from there.

For the past 3-4 years, two sisters come to temple occasionally during evenings. I think they are north Indians settled in Coimbatore. Their Mom and Dad too joins them. I don’t know what happened, this elder sister always used to stare at me as if I come to temple to look at her. It annoys me so much but what can I say? Many of my friends don’t like these girls as they show off a lot and for their age, they have too many distractions.

I always used to tell Saibaba, give me a chance to shout at this girl if she stares ( Morachify in Thinglish) at me the next time as if I am here to look at her. Yesterday, I was simply trying to sing the bhajan ‘Haridwar, Mathura, Kashi, Shirdi mein thirath saare hain” looking at Saibaba. Suddenly, this girl came with her parents, did prayers and sat.

After a while, I saw her Mother taking some kumkum and keeping it on her daughter’s forehead.  I smiled to myself because a girl can be good, bad or going in a wrong way but to a Mother, she’s always a gold. I always used to see this girl with frustration but yesterday, I felt she too is good. She too is “good” for her Mother.

Over the years, Many Mother’s used to write me about their children. Their insecurities and worries.

While on phone, One best dialogue I heared from my elderly Sai friend settled in U.S is this

“Enn ponnu library porenu solittu pora. (My daughter said she’s going to library in the university). I have to believe her”

Isn’t that sweet?

I like to watch curiously on how parents treat their grown up children especially girls as Indian cultural setup tries to keep girls too protective. To be honest, your protection is of no use. Its a connected world. Good girls remain good and those who get distracted, does. You can’t help it. Ofcourse, this fits both to your son and daughter.

I just wish everyone leads a life their parents will be proud of.

I also like to see arguments between girls and parents. I can’t count the mails I got from girls saying their parents are not accepting the guy they loved. Eventually, someone has to win. In some families, these girls stand upside down to convince their parents.

The shocking part is in some families, parents don’t accept the girl their son is in relationship with. Eventually, These guys also go with their parents words.

India must be only country which can control a Man’s life with a weapon of his parents sentiment.

You Father will get sick if you marry her. Your mom will die if you marry her. Excuse me. Stop all this non-sense. Grow up dear Momma and Pappa. You never know what your son did with this girl. I know and hence it pains me.

Many people might be wondering why I write lyrics from songs in Sai’s site. Let me clarify. There’s so much pain happening in lives of many Sai children. I must keep them happy. If you are looking for Mantra and pooja, I have that too but I can’t be too spiritual often. I have to speak for my audience and touch their lives. Imagine how it will be when I wake up at 6.30 to read a mail from a girl living abroad asking me to pray for her Mother going through Cancer? I start my day listening to stories of all kinds. Some are easy to forget while most are even hard for me to express here.

Have you ever kissed your Sister?

When I was in Mumbai, one of my student Kavita requested me to come to her home for dinner. We were chatting when her brother started to work for his night shift in Jet Airways. Before he left home, he applied sacred ash, kissed his sister’s forehead and then started to work. She told me, every time her brother leaves home to work, he does that. It was really something that made me feel good. Most of us have lots in us for our dear one’s but we hardly express it. In some families, they practice it as a ritual.

Anyway.

I am trying to divert myself Sai. There must be something I should live for and I have not discovered it yet. I am running out of time.

Bless every Mother and Father with experiences which will make them feel proud of their Son and Daughter!

I wish to dedicate this article for the love that happens between a Mom and a Daughter.

Love,

Venkat

Note: After torchering my friends at office asking them to listen to the song Sai made me find through a dream, I also made some of my friends in temple to listen to this. One of this guy said, its an old song with nice lyrics. I wish to make a video of Sai with this song but stopping myself from doing it as the lyrics also subtly has a name in it. That was more surprising to me. I can’t even make a video with this song to avoid complications but lets see. If Sai wills, I shall do it.

Further, since Sai gave me a dream as if he’s in Maroon dress, I went to Saibaba temple and felt everything is in Maroon. Ha ha…seems the whole world is running with maroon color. I even felt the Red Roses when it is in garland over Saibaba is actually Maroon in color as its dark. Sai. You know how seriously I take your dreams? Now, I am going to hug you and sleep. Once again, tell me with words what ever you wanted to communicate.