Sairam friends,
I am chanting “Sai Sai Sai” continuously from today and wish to continue doing this sacred Naam smaran as long as I can. I started doing it as I prayed Sai to fulfill one of my wish. I believe Sai will do it.
Yesterday, one of my Sai friend told me she’s depressed as she din’t do well in Exam and I kept praying for her. I was planning to write an article about this exam topic and got inspired as my friend was so bothered about it. One reason, I avoided writing it so long is because I am not legally the right person to do counseling.
I mean, If anyone who reads this are going through depression, either divert your mind doing anything useful, entertain yourself, read good Books or speak to your friends or dear ones about your problem. I can only pray for your well being. Many Sai children had wrote me in the past 9 years to pray for their Exam. This includes school exam to friends doing Doctorate.
There was a school girl who after living in U.S/Canada ( I forgot) shifted to Bangalore and can’t cope up with the new syllabus in India. She used to write me once in a while that her parents are scolding her and I simply encourage her to believe Sai will help her. After few month, I was happy to see a mail from her that she’s doing well in her studies. I don’t know if she’s coming to StarSai regularly to read this.
There was another devotee from U.S who used to worry so much that her Research paper is not being accepted or some hurdles in it etc. After 2-3 years, she was awarded Phd degree and thanked every one who prayed for her.
Now, coming to the main reason I write this article, Its about various issues related to Exam.
1. Exam Fear
2. Peer pressure
3. Exam Results considers as Status and “everything” that the world has in store for a “Big” life
1. Exam Fear
Some students have Exam fear. They study well but when they go on to face exam, they get nervous and can’t perform well. Sai has helped thousands of devotees one way or other to be confident and never to fear for Exams or anything they fear to face in life. You simply have to believe that you worked hard and you can perform well in exams.
The funniest part is, many years back, when I was in school, I used to light candles in Saibaba temple asking Baba to pass me in exams because I study only during Exam time. I wonder what I did other days. Honestly, I considered school and college as a huge burden. I never enjoyed it once. I like independence and don’t like anyone controlling me – Do this. Do that. Probably, this attitude of mine, made me hate our Education system.
Exam fear doesn’t stop with the exam you might have in school or universities. It could happen for silly reason. I know many people prefer to bribe and take a driving license and they don’t like being tested. These are men who have been driving for years very well and I get surprised when they say they fear for taking license the right way.
And then there’s fear of facing interviews. Fear of facing exams of any kind in your career. When ever you have to face any such exams or tests, please be relaxed. Make sure you tell your mind that you will do well and even if you don’t, it doesn’t matter at all. Sai is going to bless you with the best in life.
2. Peer pressure
There are good schools and Universities where most students are smart and intelligent and few will be trying hard to compete with them. These are institutions which doesn’t work for all. Just because some one else does well in studies, doesn’t mean other must do it. You can’t compare students based on what they scored during exams and that’s how it works.
In India, students have no choice but to continue staying in the same School or college until their course gets over. Not many parents allow students to quit schooling/college or shift to another college etc. So this peer pressure builds up in them and they feel being cornered based on their performance in exams.
Some students manage to survive these tests and take it normal but few are not able to manage. The result can be as below
1. They hate education and will never continue studies after their Under Graduation.
2. They take a wrong decision with out understanding that Exam’s are artificial. Its we who created exam.
Many Sai devotees worry when they see exam results. They feel Saibaba din’t help them. Well, Its OK. You can’t always be successful. Some times, its good to fail and score low because that’s life. Can you guarantee all who did well and score high in a particular exam will turn out to have a “Happy” life all through.
May be they meet with an accident. May be they will not do well in other exams. May be their character is not good and they can’t manage to perform well in their career. May be they are not honest. So success factor in Exams are simply not going to assure anyone a good life.
You can pass IAS but being Honest officer matters for Sai.
You see. Every day has a exam in it. Most of the exams we write are unseen but Sai alone knows he has tested us.
Many times, Sai tests if I am pure, I am able to control my anger and If I am not greedy. We are silently passing and failing in our day to day life in the exam kept by God.
3. Exam Results considers as Status and “everything” that the world has in store for a “Big” life
Parents consider exam results and performance of their children academically as the most important factor on Planet Earth. They wish to see their children lead a successful life and believe these exams play a key role in shaping their future. Its always good to set goals for your children and make them live ambitious. Eventually, what happens is that not all children can satisfy their parents expectations. When expectations are not fulfilled, it leads to anger. When you show your disappointment to your children, It leads to unnecessary depression and frustration.
I agree, parents in Millions of middle class families spend most of their earnings on their children’s education. The problem here is understanding the concept of being educated. Its not always the Marks your children score in the cage of school or Universities. Its how productively they apply it in future which matters. If they have enough knowledge in their field they wish to excel, your investment in education has its worth.
Most families in India has a very bad behavior of pushing their children to keep learning and show good results. Its like Status symbol if you say your children are studious. Do you have experience of relatives calling your home and asking when your results are announced for board exams? These distant relatives who suddenly appear in our life will go on to advice what we have to study and what’s good for us. De enga da irundheenga.
I was reading a joke the other day that someone got a call from a uncle who says he is his Father’s Aunts elder sisters 3rd son’s wife’s aunts husband which makes him shocked because he din’t wrote any exams recently. According to this guy, such relatives will call only during exam results. So its Indian relatives and friends habit of poking and comparing results of some one living too far with their children who wrote such exams years back.
Please for Gods sake don’t judge students based on their performance in exams.
The best thing that can happen to us is failure for it makes us more ordinary and simple.
People who fail early in their life are able to cope up with any other hurdles in their life in future.
One of my friend was telling about a girl who passed away after a surgery. Her husband who was very successful both in his education and career could not bear the shock. He went to the terrace and did things which no one expected.
I don’t know if I got the story right. What matters is my worry about reality. I am really concerned about Students taking a wrong decision after their results or any other silly reasons like they can’t get the job they desires, some thing happened which makes them feel ashamed etc.
Sai faith in a country where Exams are worth a life – You can Live
Life is very beautiful and please Sai, Save this Country from being too stupid that they feed adults that their performance in school and colleges are the only reason they live this life. Its important to show interest in Studies. You just do what you can and don’t worry about results.
When I write this article, I just feel problems in life is based on the environment we create. When you are in school or college, it creates a environment where you are judged by your performance and intelligence. When you are at work, you are judged by few other aspects. Honestly, nothing is true as these are man made.
We set a standards for our self and expect everyone to fall in line with it which is impossible.
Never bother what your dear ones, relatives, friends or parents speak about you based on your exam results. Just remember they din’t see your values. If someone is upset with you for your performance, Don’t take it to heart. Parents loves you for what you are.
Statistics really shocks me that in a Non profit counseling center where they give advice and guidance, motivation for students who are depressed, most of the calls comes after exam results. Does this mean, we are loosing wonderful children and adults just because the world judges them based on a single exam?
Please come out of this and be normal.
Its OK if your children are not smart as other kids you imagine.
Keep encouraging your friends or relatives who face exam. If their results are good, be happy and if its not good, just motivate them. Its one life and please don’t hurt anyone with your so called “Advice”.
Please let go of things.
Everyone has some skills in them and Sai will bring out the best in your children.
Sai faith also has to be understood properly. Many students complain that Sai din’t help them and they din’t do well in exams. Well. May be he din’t but you have a big life ahead. You are not going to be worse off. You will surely have a opportunity you din’t know yet and Sai will bring out the best in you.
OK friends. My friends depression after her exam made me write this article which I planned to write several month back. I welcome useful comments which can motivate students and help them come out of worries.
Life is really beautiful
Be relaxed and Stay strong internally because Sai has a pearl in store for you.
Have Faith and Patience. Sai will make you shine someday.
Love,
Venkat
Little servant of Shirdi Saibaba
Jai Sairam! Well written article Venkatji. If only Indians realized this and not commit suicide so much after the exam results are released. India and Japan are probably among the top for such incidents given all the pressure. Some of the western thinking could be adopted in India for these situations.
Exams are not the only way to prove your smartness and many that failed in school still turned out to be super successful in life and even got rich although it’s not the recipe for success to fail in school 🙂 Most importantly, success can be measured in so many ways other than money or fame…it’s about doing what you enjoy daily and being content. Sadly that’s not how the society works.