Sai friends! What is this relationship called?

Sairam friends,

After writing this article, I went to Nagasai Mandir, lit lamps and then went to Saradhambal temple. I love the Aadi Sankara and the Mother in that temple. One of my Sai friend Gowthami has sent this below mail.

Celebrating Sainath Stavan Manjari

Sairam Venkat,

It feels good to write to you.Hope everything goes well.I again wish that my mail should bring you happiness. I am writing to you now that when you pray add me and my family’s name just once in your prayers. Because the safest place is to be someone’s prayers. By the way, you must be knowing that tomorrow is September 12, the day when Sainath Stavan Manjari is written and may be recited in BABA’s presence. Total 98 years as of today.I wish I were present there at that moment then.I’m happy and  lucky  that I knew the name of Stavan manjari.

I’m a little girl who just took my baby steps just now and sometimes I show arrogance towards everyone that I know everything. But I’m the most stupid ones and I even know it. Mostly no desires and no wishes for me now and everything left to BABA but I would pray that I wanted to be a part of Shirdi’s centenary celebrations.

Gowthami

Later, she mentioned that it’s actually the 98th year of Saibaba’s Mahasamadhi ceremony and not Sainath Stavan Manjari. Anyway, irrespective of such innocent mistakes my Sai friends do, I still respect them because I always say that there are no rules and regulations in Sai devotion. I like such innocent Sai devotees who love him deeply. So even if they send some wrong information with excitement, I take it as a message from Sai.

I felt instead of reading my story, this article must spread the greatness of Sainath Stavan Manjari. So showed her mail to you. I read it this afternoon and realized there’s so much divinity in every word but it looks un-poetic when you actually read it. Gradually, you will realize its greatness.

Yesterday was my cousin’s wedding reception. Some relatives had come home and I had to take them places and had to ride twice in my kutti car. When I was driving alone, I listened to some songs. I listened to Sai Shej Aarti as it was night. Then, I listened to “Sun raha hai na tu”…Oh..How much I love this song like many of you do. And then came the song which made me remember my film-making days.

Yeh rishta kya kehlata hai from Meenaxi 

It was one of the last Hindi film post-production which I watched closely in the editing room. Meenaxi – The tale of 3 cities is set in the beautiful city of Prague in Europe and the other 2 cities were Hyderabad and Jaisalmer. I already have a friend in Spain who’s devoted to Shirdi Saibaba. I met a girl in Shirdi who was from Europe. I think she said Finland. The coming years will be a decade of Sai devotion happening in Europe and other western countries.

I wish to show you how this city of Prague is with another photography courtesy of Wikipedia. I have never traveled outside India. Some devotees invite me to their places abroad but I wanted to go only when I have a business to do. I wish to visit these beautiful places and do photography. I will also speak about Sai where ever I go. Ha ha…

Vltava River flowing through Prague

Anyway, This article is about people I call “Sai friends”.

I have been close to several of these Sai children. We used to share a lot about Saibaba, speak a lot about our own lives and even try to meet. Honestly, I have not met 99% of my Sai friends as they live in some other city or state. Some years back, My parents used to shout at me for always being on phone with my Sai friends. My Ma used to say “What are you speaking?” “Are you going to marry this girl?” To tell you the truth, some of my best Sai friends are already booked. They used to be in a relationship or going through a painful situation. Gradually, their life will change.

Once, these Sai friends is about to get married, I slowly stop talking to them but always will be happy if they call me occasionally.

One of my such a Sai friend is Priya from Mumbai. We used to talk so much about Sai and our lives. Once, she called me and said “I got engaged”. I thought she would never speak to me again but occasionally, she calls me and asks what’s happening in my life?

My Sai friends who suddenly change and loose faith in Saibaba

There are two such girls who completely changed. One of these girl Suchita from Chennai was in touch with me when she was close to Sai. During that time, she was praying Baba to bless her to get her love back. It did not happen. Within a year, I realize this girl completely changed. Maybe, She still loves Baba but she lives her own life. Even this time, when I went to Chennai, I wanted to check if she’s doing well? I stopped myself because Sai did not approve of me calling her.

Another girl Preeti from Indore was a very very good Sai friend of mine. Infact, Once Lord Ganesha appeared in her dream and said “He makes websites for all Gods but not me”. She woke up and mailed me saying “Ganesha is angry with you” ha ha..

After few years, I tracked her number and checked if shes’ doing well. She has become a Company Secretary and doing great career-wise. But she became very practical. She doesn’t speak about Saibaba any more. This is not the Preeti I know. Even when I write this, I feel some tears in my eyes. She’s a good girl, sincere in her studies, and professionally settled. When and how did she lose her love in Saibaba? Even if she reads this, I don’t mind because I lost the Preeti who loves Sai.

My Sai friends who suddenly lose contact with me

People write to me when they want and some of them become my friends. Gradually, they get busy with their life. I have lost contacts with few such wonderful Sai friends. Some of them are elderly, married women and some of them are Men who write to me regularly and a few girls.

Once, a guy from Bangalore wrote to me about his marriage issue. I guided him but his marriage failed. One guy kept telling me that his kids are often getting sick and he thinks its because he misbehaved with few girls before he got married. I don’t know what happened to these Men. Sai must take care of them.

Many elderly Sai devotees who had been in touch with me regularly disappeared after few years. Some of these have been blessed with children after Sai told that to me in dream. Some of them had been married and some just have stupid reasons to quit me.

Anyway, I just don’t know what relationship is this? I basically like speaking to people who love Sai and who are crazy about Saibaba but eventually, they all get busy with life. “Sai” factor unites us at some point in their life and gradually they move ahead with their life.

Even today, Shamya wrote me requesting not to post her complete mail in previous article –  Sai, once you be in my place. I told her all I have kept thousands of mails from Sai children confidentially but I posted her’s as I was impressed by her devotion on Saibaba and want the world to know about it.

Sai’s guidance to maintain a safe distance from some of these acquaintances 

A year back, someone from Singapore became a good Sai friend of mine. Once, just before I woke up, Sai showed me a dream as if her husband tells her “Don’t speak to him often”. I forgot what exactly he said but Sai clearly told me her husband is not comfortable in her speaking to me. I understood the situation and blocked her in my cloud messaging platform. Sometime back one of my friends who checked my mobile was shocked that there are 130 people blocked in my WhatsApp. Not because I hate them but because I Sai wants me to maintain a safe distance though they are good Sai children.

People who seek my guidance anonymously 

Apart from this, there are Sai devotees who write to me anonymously seeking some guidance. Already, I tell people not to depend on what I say because I am myself dependent on Saibaba. When I can’t judge my own life, how can I actually do good to others. I can simply pray for them and say some good words to make them feel comfortable. That’s it. I mostly avoid replying people who write anonymously. When I have no time to reply people who tell me their whole life with confidence in me, why should I take time for people who don’t trust me. I am an after-all little servant of Saibaba.

So what really is this relationship called “Sai friend”?

They are people who love Saibaba and worship him dearly. At one period of their life, they become my friends but most of them disappear. During Baba’s lifetime too, some devotees were good friends. They used to serve Baba and chat about him and also celebrate his glory together. Later, everyone will go in their own way.

Sai pulls people together in his own way and he doesn’t want me to worry when they disappear.

So its like a river. In the past 11 years, I have seen so many people who love Sai deeply. I get attracted to them easily but I also see them as a part of my beautiful StarSai Family.

This season, in StarSai the content theme is to relate articles with a song from Bollywood movies.

I remember every single shot and cuts of this beautiful song composed by A. R. Rahman

Yeh rishta kya kehlata hai from Meenaxi 

Koi sacche khwab dikhakar 

aankhon mein sama jata hai 

Gets mingled in your eyes.

This relation…

What is this relationship called?

jab sooraj dhakne lagta hai 

and when light starts to shrink.

Some strange thing embraces my breath.

I come closer to my heart

and my heart comes closer to me.

What is this relationship called?

Now, I shall take you on a small flashback. When I see the Saibaba murti below, I feel like my life is a white paper and Sai wrote over it. Hence, he influenced my journey as per his wish.

My first few set backs in career

I was supposed to be a part of the cinematography team in Meenaxi which never happened. It got depressed a lot as I waited more than a year to assist a famous cinematographer. One of the reasons I decided to do something else in life rather than waiting too long desiring to be a film-maker was this incident. It was really painful for me as I was passionate about film-making those days. Later, I wrote a full-length screenplay about a love story between a War Photographer and a Nurse. I worked on the project for over 6 months and enjoyed writing screen-play.

Whenever I listen to this song alone while driving, it makes me remember how I was and how I am today? What dreams I had and today, my only dream is for Sai. At least this dream might come true as it’s for a good cause. I used to have a portrait of Shirdi Saibaba in my room in Chennai. Whenever I start for work, I kiss Sai on his lip.

My roommate used to say “Adicharuya..Hollywood will fail by the way you kiss Saibaba”.

Once, I had a poster of Kareena Kapoor stuck in my room. It was a bit glamorous. A friend who walked in said “When you are so devoted to Sai, should you have this poster of Kareena”. I removed it in 3 days. May be it was a hint from Sai that I will never be a film-maker.

Edit…I posted a photo of myself taken in the editing room but I decided to take it offline. Sorry I feel pained whenever I see my past. Those memories are haunting me.

I never expressed this in StarSai ever before but today, I felt like writing. Many people who speak to me casually say, “You must have remained in the industry”. In that case, I would have not served Sai and got so many experiences from Saibaba like this. Living in Coimbatore with my parents too is a gift because there’s more peace here and in Nagasai temple.

Being a Servant of Sai is a gift. Maybe, I am not supposed get whatever I desire. Career…My past love. Everything I desire isn’t made for me.

So are my Sai friends..

They remain with me for a particular period and then disappear.

Some people used to say “You have friends everywhere”. Yes. I do but they keep changing. Its like flowing river.

All relationships are like this.

In 2013, when I was pained as a girl whom I truly trusted left me, I opened Sai’s holy book and pleaded him to guide me.

He said ‘Relationships are like wooden logs which meets in a flowing river. We think its permanent but when the water flows, some wooden logs had to get separated and move on..”

The one who remains with me forever is Sai.

Sai alone.

My only true friend.

Om Sai Ram

Venkat

These days, I desire to create videos for Sai. I wish to speak on inspirational topics. Don’t know if I have the skill to do it. All this makes me remember my past. I just wanted to use all the knowledge I have for Sai and to create a positive impact on the lives of millions of people. Let’s see. If this desire will come true or this too isn’t for me. Like all other desires…