Sairam friends,
Not just in reality. Sai occasionally tests my purity through dreams also. Its not test. Its his own way of making me realize “Men are Men” and you must keep a check on your thought process every single fraction of a second.
These days, I remembered a song by a band called Silk Route. Its such a beautiful song that I kept humming this song yesturday. It goes like this..
Deewana ban gaya hoon main chaahat me teri
Dooba dooba rehtaaaa hoon aankhon me teri
Deewana ban gaya hoon main chaahat me teri
ab din gujarte nahin
Ratein katati nahin
Teri tasvir se baat banati nahin..hoooo aa-ja
Rougly translated..
I keep myself sinking into your eyes
I have become mad in your love
Now days are not easy to pass
Nor even nights pass
Its not possible to talk with your photo, o please come on
I went to Saibaba temple, lit lamps, Offered garland and came home. I wrote this article at night – Sai, I trust you but I am totally confused
I was too tired and slept off. I got the following dream
I see myself in a very beautiful, scenic location. I am standing in a small hill but theres a beach near by. Some tourists are always present in that place but I stand in a lonely place. I see a girl swimming in the beach and suddenly she comes towards me. We both start to chat. I speak to her in such a way that I describe how beautiful she is like I am flirting with her.
Some men who who are working in that area cook rice and have food. They are watching me which makes me feel little disturbed.
That’s it.
I woke up and realized that the song I was humming all day has connection with the dream. Its like “Dooba Dooba” means sinking and hence he showed a girl who was going into water, swimming and tested what will I do if I meet such a girl. Oru Paatu kekradhu Thappa Sai? I just like this song and humming. So you decided to test my purity haan?
What did I learn from the dream?
Its easy to write articles saying “Respect Women in your life“. Do this..do that but how do I actually perceive a girl if I come across one matters for Sai.
May be, he’s teaching me not to get distracted and not judge a women by her dress.
A year back, I had a travel blog. I have seen so many girls traveling around the world and wonder how they manage all alone. One of this girl is very popular that she even writes in Huffington Post. I remember Re-Tweeting her occasionally as everyone likes her blog. How she being a single girl, travels so much.
Yes, I’m Pretty and I’m Traveling Alone
This is her photograph during her India trip
Photo used with courtesy
Have you read the letter Abitabh Bachan wrote to his Grand Daughters?
I like the following lines.
“Both of you may be a Nanda or a Bachchan, but you are also girls…women !
And because you are women people will force their thinking, their boundaries on you.
They will tell you how to dress, how to behave, who you can meet and where you can go.
Don’t live in the shadows of people’s judgement. Make your own choices in the light of your own wisdom.
Don’t let anyone make you believe that the length of your skirt is a measure of your character.
Don’t let anyone’s opinion of who you should be friends with, dictate who you will be friends with.
Don’t get married for any other reason other than you want to get married.
People will talk. They shall say some terrible things. But that doesn’t mean you have to listen to everyone. Never ever worry about – log kya kahenge.”
People commented various stuff regarding this letter but I did liked it most. Especially the part where he says “Don’t judge a girl by her dress”. This suits a lot for a country like India because we assume that the one who dresses as she likes is not a good girl.
When ever my Sister comes to India, she wears skirts and all other collections she has because she’s almost American now and that’s how she dresses. Her friends call her “Fashion Statement” and many people used to ask how you are like this and your Sister is so different. Yes she is and I love her. My aunt used to comment on the way my Sister dresses even now. May be, since she is protective, my aunt wants my Sister to wear a chudi.
I basically felt bad for this dream. There’s another reason Sai would have shown this dream.
Last Morning, I had to call some girl in Delhi for official work. I told my friends “I am going to call Shivani”.
I enquired something and waited for a call.
As soon as I got the call, I said
“Shivani is calling…………..”
and happily took the phone.
Its an official call. Don’t I know to be careful?
I had attended the call before I said above words. So when I started to talk, the girl laughed so much. She did not took it badly but I felt bad of myself.
After I spoke, One of my friend said
“You must be a watchman in girls hostel”
I felt really insulted by this comment but probably that’s how I show myself infront of my friends. I always have such fun. If we are going to an event, I ask “Will there be girls in the event?” etc. Though I do it for fun, the message I convey to my friends is that ..I am interested in girls. Is it not?
Saibaba never ever is against having fun. He’s OK when I make fun and play around.
Sai wanted me to keep a check on what I am deep inside
Through this dream, Saibaba wanted me to keep a check on what I think deep inside me about Women. Writing a million articles about respecting women is different from being good to a women when you meet her alone. Why should I even write this article. I could have kept this dream aside and just wrote about the dreams in which Saibaba showed Gods and Goddess.
I am openly telling this to you because you must learn what really matters for Saibaba.
Its not external show off. Its what I am “Inside” which matters for Sai.
Externally, I do all good but deep inside, I have to be Pure.
I am not pure as of today. I know Sai. You don’t like me but I shall keep a check on it.
I am not angel Baba. I am human. I do mess up.
But I have so many girls as my Sai friends. Am I not good to them and I see all of them as my little Sisters?
You are expecting too much from me Sai and I shall certainly try to satisfy your expectations.
Sai…My life is yours. My experiences are yours. My attitude is yours and I am yours.
I mess up but I belong to Sai!
Baba, I am going through painful situation and asking you to guide me regarding that. I don’t mind you want me to make me pure through such occasional ‘Deep in your heart Test”. But I am pleading you to answer me as I am into depression. Please show me your grace atleast now. I am too embarrassed for all that happened.
Love you Sai,
Getting too late to work
Tata
Venkat
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