Sai saved me from worst and my responsibilities

Sairam friends,

Yesterday, I had been from work to my cousin’s wedding in the evening. My parents could not come and I was blinking, standing alone, leading on the wall and checking mails from devotees.

Sai saved me from worst

I have been waiting too long to get married and its not that I don’t know a girl but just that I depend on Sai’s approval if I should proceed. I have suffered enough in past and hence I have to be careful. Its OK if I don’t get married too but I can’t marry anyone who Sai doesn’t allow me to. My parents tell me, then ask your Baba to show you the girl. I said, He might show a girl even through you but may be my time hasn’t come.

I can complain that Saibaba has never helped me and get depressed. This may be true for sure but Sai has taken other way round to help me. Probably, Sai made me like few girls with whom I had some debt to pay back. We all are born to finish off our debt we had with so many people. In relationship, if we suffer, it just means, we would have done some sin to the person in previous birth and in this birth they are hurting us.

When Sai himself makes us meet someone, like them and in the end when we are into some pain, we think Sai has purposely hurt us.

This is just Sai’s way of making us go through what we are supposed to face so that we are out of our Karmic bond.

Over the years, This is how, I have taken life every time, I go through some kind of suffering.

Sai has been always with me holding my palm.

Dream this morning:

Sai showed me a very divine dream this morning of Lord Ganesha and Murugan. I felt really blessed. Then I Sai also showed a girl who might like me but things may not workout in the long run. Well. Why does Sai show such dreams to me? Its clear. There are so many couples who like each other, get married and then go through lots of difficulties in living peacefully. Sai might have made me wait long but he needs his own time to clear off all my karmic bonds.

At this stage, I am trying to make my parents happy but Sai is a saint who knows whats going to happen in future. So my life and decision depends on Sai’s own desire and wish.

Incident in Shirdi Saibaba’s life time:

You can ask if Shirdi Saibaba does this kind of work of helping me choosing my girl. I believe he will. After so many years, I don’t want to interfere with him either. I just let him do what he wishes to go.

There’s a incident in Sai’s life time. The father of boy comes to have darshan of Saibaba to bless his son to get married. The boys Father suggests 4 girls and keeps their horoscope in front of Saibaba. Sai selects a girl and asks the Father to get his son to marry the girl.

Sai never bothered to open these Horoscope books etc. Sai knows who’s who and who’s right for the boy and he did that with in 3 minutes.

These days, I am trying to show out that am happy and at least the way I write in StarSai has changed a lot. I am trying to show that I enjoy with what Sai has given me on a day to day basis. I can’t keep complaining him. Further, I have tried to add some stories which doesn’t have any thing to do with spirituality but myself. I tried to be very casual when I wrote Met a Beautiful Mind

In future, I might feel embarrassed why I wrote it and remove it from the site. To me, its really important to be honest and truthful if you serve Saibaba. I don’t want to portray myself as a saintly person as that’s not what I am.

I want to live as every other ordinary Shirdi Saibaba devotee and serve Sai in my own way.I might not be right always but I make sure, I don’t hurt any one.

I call it serving but may be its just my expression of love on Saibaba. That’s it.

I surrender to Shirdi Saibaba and let him do what he thinks is right for me.

Now, lets go to the next section of this article…

Some of my responsibilities

I might look like simply writing about my life and incidents about Shirdi Saibaba but this is just momentary. Sai has given me some responsibilities. There are few things Sai wants me to do in future and all these years he has only been preparing me for that.

I might some being relaxed but only my parents and I know what I am going through. This process of crossing the worldly life is painful.I have a Guru who is taking me in the right direction and mean while, I myself don’t agree with the path he takes me and he has been convincing me for years now.

How can I forget the favor Saibaba has done on me which I easily ignore as small favors? Sai has done a lot to me and I too have to work for him for rest of my life.

I am very stubborn in this issue alone and might have hurt few in past. Forgive me Sai.

My life belongs to you. My body, Mind and Soul is yours.

I don’t know to sing Aarti and I also never read Sai Satcharitra regularly. I might be such a irregular devotee of yours but I know we both share several births of relationship.

I have always been the same stupid and You tolerated me every time being my sweet Guru.

I love you Sai and I know you are taking me to the right destination.

Venkat