The book which inspired me to work for Womens Rights – Do they hear you when you cry?

Sairam friends,

Note – I don’t link to,  support or have any thing to do with Women’s Rights organization. . So mailing me regarding it is of no use.  I just choose the way of spiritually making men and women understand that they must not harm women.Many who reads StarSai might think why I write about Respecting women and being good to them in many articles. It has got something to do with what I learned from few spiritual books like Ganesha Purana etc. My Mother also is  a inspiration. Beyond all this is the book I read years back  – “Do they Hear you When you Cry?”

This article speaks about FGM which is a custom followed in some African countries. If you are not comfortable learning about it please do not read further. I write it in StarSai as its a way of creating awareness. We can’t do much but knowing others suffering makes us better human.

Can you flee your country to escape from a bad custom, seeking asylum in America only to end up in American prisons for the next 16 month?

Do they hear you when you cry is a real life story of a African girl who’s life was charming until her fathers death. She was asked to marry a man who is 45 years old and said that she will undergo genital circumcision the very next day. Fouziya decides to flee Togo the night before her marriage. What happens next is this touching story that  portrays one women’s fight against century old custom.  It touches your heart so deeply that you want to do something good for women rest of your life. A touching story that celebrates humanity.

Though StarSai is supposed to be a site in which I am expected to write about Shirdi Sai Baba and his leela, my past few articles has touched my relationship pains and how I worship Sai to show me a way. Due to the sufferings I faced over the years, I was very keen in doing something for welfare of Women. Spiritually, It helps me redeem the sins i might have done in my past several births and also I honestly believe in a girls/Womens Ashirwad – Blessing. Read below link

 Sumangali pooja which taught me the greatness of Respecting women in your life

I have known families destroyed by doing bad deeds to women.  Bad deeds done to a Man, A brahman, A cow can be accounted as a big sin but worse than that is a curse from a women for a any harm you might have caused to her. Women too commit sins against man and to another women.

I remember my Mom scaring me when I was still in school saying “If you make a girl or a women cry, you will suffer for 7 births”.

I probably would have been a biggest sinner in Chitra Gupta’s registry. Hopefully not as i had a Vision of Chitra Gupta in 2005 from a very ancient palm leaf. One of my Sai Guru read it for me which sent chills to my bone.  Anyway, All i could guess is

“Sai wants me to accept all the sufferings of seven birth in one shot – this one birth.”

He he..I feel painful when I write this but that’s how I have seen my life so far.

Writing my first screenplay:

It must be sometime in 2002 when I was writing my first screen play “Girl Friend” exactly the way Hollywood writers work on screenplay. One minute on page must convert to one minute on screen – crisp 125 pages. I changed the name as “For Love”. The only person in the film Industry to have read my screen play is a famous Editor who on his way back in flight from Hyderabad to Chennai read it and said its really interesting. When i left film industry, the only treasure that stayed with me is this beautiful screenplay i wrote. Hopefully, I wish to film it sometime in my life.

Saraswathi can make you write:

My language is not so good but when it comes to creative and Imagination aspect of writing, I believe story builds on its own as you write. I call it blessing of Goddess Saraswathi. My sweet Koothanur Maha Saraswathi whom i adore. The meaning of “Saras” itself is “To flow” . She’s like a river which flows. If you have her blessing, she makes you do things without your knowledge.

Writers Block:

Every writer has a point where he/she can’t move forward. The story never seems to flow. I try to read books or watch movies during such times. I went to Landmark book shop to get some inspiration.  While I was passing by many selves with numerous books, I took this book with a bright yellow cover with a photograph of African girl on it. Spending 200 to 300 Rs for a book was a fortune for me those days. So I think many times before i buy a book.

Book Shops are to spend time not to spend money…..He he

The next few days, “Do they hear you when you cry” was part of my life. Where ever I go, i read few pages of the book. In the editing room,  German Cultural center and at my room. Sometimes, I was so touched by the real life story of this African girl that I shed tears for her. I was angered internally that there are countries and culture in this world where women are treated so badly almost as slaves.

Kakia – A custom in African countries which has been harming women for centuries:

In some African countries, there’s a custom in which women before or after marriage are forced into Genital Circumcision. It’s done without any anesthesia by an old women – traditional circumciser using a knife, razor or scissors.  Two to four women hold the girls hands and legs when the girl will be crying like hell.  Most of the times, girls have fever running high temperatures and some even dies. In Africa both men and women support this so called custom and its been followed for several centuries.

Story of Fauziya Kassindja –  Here, for the first time, is Fauziya’s dramatic personal story, told in her own words, vividly detailing her life as a young woman in Togo and her nightmarish day-to-day existence in American prisons. It is a story of faith and freedom, courage and inspiration – one that you will not easily forget..

Fouziya was just 17 year old girl when she was forced to marry a man who was 45 and she’s going to be his 4th wife. The worst part is she’s supposed to undergo painful Genital mutilation the very next day. She has no chances but to flee the little west African country of Togo.

With the help of a sister and a few dollars, with only the clothes on her back, having never been outside West Africa, Fauziya Kassindja ran away from home and, like so many immigrants before her, came to America in search of freedom. The way she describes how she walked in the desert sand and when she was too tired, she sits in a shade of a tree. A lion sudden

She reaches United States of America believing her life is going to be paradise.

What she found instead when she landed at Newark International Airport and in the arms of the Immigration and Naturalization Service in December of 1994 was that those who seek asylum are frequently treated as criminals.

She was put in detention where she remained for 18 months before being finally granted asylum on the basis of gender-based persecution.  She remained in prison for a total of 18 months, during which she broke down and asked to be sent back to Togo to escape the nightmare she was going through in prison. In prison she was strip-searched, put in chains, put in solitary confinement for over two weeks after being misdiagnosed with tuberculosis, and housed in a maximum-security prison with violent criminals with her health deteriorating dangerously.

With the help of a cousin living in the US and a dedicated law student named Layli Miller Bashir, Kassindja obtained legal representation and prevented her eventual deportation. Bashir along with high profile FGM activists initiated a huge legal battle to free Kassindja and grant her asylum.

On June 13, 1996, Kassindja and her legal team won a landmark case that created the precedence for all seeking asylum in the US on the grounds of gender-based persecution.

Do They Hear You When You Cry is her unforgettable chronicle of triumph.

I was so much inspired by this book that I really wanted to do something for women’s welfare. You see, this doesn’t mean I go raise my voice against any women in problem. India has numerous incidents happening against women. I took a subtle way of writing about Respecting women and being good to them. I have been doing it for past several years when ever someone mails me with their family problem or other issues.

Got a mail from Fauziya:

I love web research for over a decade and somehow tracked email id of Fauziya and mailed her how much i felt sorry for her and truly loved her story and appreciated her bravery. She replied me back in a week. I was so exited

” Thanks for your concern. I am happily married and have 3 kids now..triplets.- Fouziya”

I went to my Editing room and said all my friends…. I got mail from Fauziya..I got mail from Fauziya…he he…They don’t know what it means to me. To me, its celebrating a women’s dream for a better life.

What you can do to work for Women’s Rights:

1. Women’s rights doesn’t actually has something to do with helping some women in a problem. There are organizations which has ability to do it. As an Individual, we can make our self a better human being who cares for women around us. Basically its just the thought process which needs to change.

2. You can make sure that you don’t knowingly harm any women.

3. You can also be a part of Equality Now:

Founded in 1992, Equality Now is an organization that advocates for the human rights of women and girls around the world by raising international visibility of individual cases of abuse, mobilizing public support through our global membership, and wielding strategic political pressure to ensure that governments enact or enforce laws and policies that uphold the rights of women and girls

www.equalitynow.org

More about Female genital mutilation from Wikipedia:

Female genital mutilation (FGM), also known as female genital cutting (FGC) and female circumcision (FC), is defined by the World Health Organization (WHO) as “all procedures that involve partial or total removal of the external female genitalia, or other injury to the female genital organs for non-medical reasons.”

According to the WHO, it is practiced mainly in 28 countries in western, eastern, and north-eastern Africa, and in parts of Asia and the Middle East. The organization estimates that 140 million women and girls around the world have experienced the procedure, including 101 million in Africa.

Opposition to it focuses on the human and children’s rights violations, lack of informed consent and the health consequences, which can include recurrent urinary infections, chronic pain, infertility, fatal hemorrhaging, the development of epidermoid cysts, and complications during childbirth.

That’s it friends.

It’s going to be two o clock at night. Already my Amma and Appa woke up and came into my room asking if i didn’t sleep yet. I was too tired after coming from Saibaba temple but I wanted to do something good today. I hope Sai devotees took this article positively though it’s a sensitive issue.

Please do good to your mother, sister, Daughter, Wife, Friends, Cousins who ever are in pain or in some difficulties.

Let’s celebrate humanity by being good to women around us.

Sairam

My eyes are closing now baba.

Venkat

Always in the holy feet of Shirdi Sai Baba

18/4/2013