Sairam friends,
During the first week of November 2016, I had a dream in which Sai assured something. I was really confused the next day but asked Sai tell me when is it going to happen? The very night I had a dream in which Sai hinted me that it will happen from June 2017 onwards.
I kept saying Sai that I can’t wait that long but since I have to believe in your words, I shall hold on to it. It was really hard for me to pass on these seven month. It seems as if I had to stay calm for over 7 years. The God of time and days finally took me to the time Sai asked me to wait for. There’s no reason to be happy yet but last night, I had been to Saibaba temple, claimed up the terrace to offer garlands and this is what I told Baba.
“Your words are my life Sai and hence I am happy that I abided by your words and waited all these days. Now, please show me a way and make your words come true”.
There’s a reason why I write this on StarSai.
There’s something good about getting old. You start to realize why you actually desired someone in the first place? I felt really embarrassed because of the whole episode. Just because Sai assured something, I must have not got excited. I must have kept everything within myself secretly and never revealed it to anyone. All my sufferings is because I was too excited and openly shared it.
I can only feel satisfied that I behaved the way Sai expects his devotees to behave. I never lost my patience all these years. I adjusted what ever people think and speak out. I might be phychic, mad, fool or crazy devotee of Sai but in order to please a Guru, I accepted what ever other’s might think of me.
Sai has no reasons to confuse me and humiliate me. Why should he show me some dreams and make me suffer for several months? Saibaba must have got a reason to play around with me and I know its all for good. I just told Baba, I can’t come out of this embarrassement and I wish to prove that you are involved in this. I was very careful all these years but somehow lost my mind and was too excited with Sai dreams.
Anyway, Lesson well learned –
When Saibaba shows a dream, keep it to yourself at the max. Atleast don’t get excited about it because people don’t understand Sai and they will doubt you.
I thought several times to publish this article or not because over the years, I wrote a lot about my personal life and this incident in the past 8-9 month is truly tested me as a devotee. Sai can play around with me telling something and make me wait so long. I don’t mind doing that. Just that, I will be satisfied if Sai lets everyone realize he has a role to play in what ever happened.
I don’t have much expectation.
I just have Sai and let him do what ever he desires should happen in my life.
Om Sai Ram
Venkat
